Three...

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Can I just say how happy it makes me to write this post tonight? I have been feeling crappy the past few days and I needed a pick up in the worst way. And tonight I got the little bit of extra fuel I needed added to my fire.

I have been in hell the last month or so. My trainer has worked me hard. That's what I get for starting a weight loss and diet journey this time of year. And while I questioned my sanity, I know now that I did the right thing. Because, while these small victories would still be sweet any other time of the year, they are especially sweet now. With the holidays. And the food.

I weigh myself daily. Some may argue that it's a bit much. But for me, I have to. Not because I am obsessed, but because I know how easy it is to stray of course. I know how quickly I can undo everything that I have done. I am aware. And that is a good thing.

If breaking 200 pounds for the first time in 5 or so years was the cry heard round the block, then tonight was the cry heard round the town. Because, to be completely honest, I didn't expect to get past the 195 I had been sitting at for the last freaking week. 10 pounds away from celebrating a 50 pound loss. So close. Yet so far.

So, I weighed myself today. Not expecting much. I wasn't feeling good. I was looking at the same number day in and day out.

But, today I saw it. I saw a sign that I am moving in the right direction. That the hell I am putting myself through every week with my trainer, the extra miles I put on the treadmill, the extra reps I do, are finally paying off.

188.

3 pounds away from 50. Three.

As of right now, in this moment, I weigh less than I have in SEVEN years. I am 28 pounds away from my goal weight.

But, I am not focused on that. I know that as I inch closer to my goal, there is going to be a wall or two that is going to be hit. And that is okay. My trainer and I have talked about it. We are expecting it. And are prepared to deal with it.

But I am not focusing on that at the moment.

I am staring down the barrel of my gun and I have 3 more pounds that need to be dealt with. 3 more pounds that are in between me and my second goal of 50 pounds lost. That is my focus now.

The other stuff matters. But right now, what is most important to me is saying Bon Voyage to these last three pounds and celebrating the next milestone...50 pounds lost. Watch out, here I come!