A sad realization

This past week wasn't good. By any stretch of the word. But, it was eye opening to say the least. I finally have a clear idea of my place in certain people's lives.

But that wasn't what my sad realization was.

I've gained some weight. My clothes no longer fit comfortably. Some of the health problems I had prior to losing all this weight, have started to come back. I am not working out. In short, I feel like I have just given up.

I can't be an effective personal trainer or coach if I can't get my own life under control. I mean, whose going to trust a personal trainer like me?

And that realization hurts. Big time. Personal training and everything else I do, means the world to me. I worked hard to get to that point. I love being a trainer. I love being able to help people change their lives. But, if I can't change my own life, then how can I help others change theirs?

For the past two years, my goal was to become a personal trainer and make a name for myself in the fitness industry. I wanted to be the next greatest success story...instead, I feel like just another failure.

I am not writing this post for sympathy. I am writing it because from day one, I promised to always be transparent when it came to this journey. Trust me, putting myself out there like this is hard...and I know emails will come in (as they always do) ripping me apart. And that's okay. Over the last couple of years, I have developed a thick skin.

I still believe I can be a great trainer.  I still believe I can change people's lives. And I still believe I can be the next greatest success story.

I just need to work a little harder.